9/15/08

Random thoughts on a Random day.

First, a list of things I wish I could do on a daily basis, but I can't due to location location location.

-I wish I could climb trees... when I lived in Virginia we lived across the street from a forest, I don't remember much, but I could sure as hell climb those trees now.

-Take a hike in the woods. You know, a nice shady trip with the sound of the forest/woods around you, green everywhere, perhaps a lake.

-Wade through a river, or heck, just walk next to a river, perhaps put my feet in the water, stand in the river, or sit on a bridge and go fishing.

-lie on the grass and stare at the sky, just to think. Can't do that here, too many people, the weather is never nice enough, and the Grass isn't pleasant where we actually have it.

-Walk places, I greatly wish I lived in the downtown areas of a city, where everything was walking distance from me, and there were interesting people, and interesting stores.

This list could go on, but those are some of the main points.

I've started to think that a person without emotions would probably be smarter (of a higher intelligence?) than a person who is weighed down with emotions. Without these emotions clouding their thoughts then they'd have a more logical mindset and would be able to correctly weigh the importance of things in situations. Of course, this probably means they'd be horridly socially awkward, but they wouldn't have the need for any social companionship as talking to people wouldn't bring them any emotion they didn't have.
While realizing this, there was a snag in my logic... I thought... "why would they want to be smart, what would make them go on." Caitlin helped me through this. We decided that in this day in age, with almost any type of upbringing the person would feel an obligation; not fueled by any emotions, needing no motivation, to succeed in life, in the materialistic sort of the world.
Thats all I have for now, I will think on this more...

Last random thought:
I realized why I could never bring myself to ask a guy out...
I don't see why anyone would like a person like me in that type of way, thats why I always find people who have crushes on me absolutely nuts, and ask if they were dared when they tell me this... Which means that if I told the guy that I liked him, I'd be struck down with disappointment (that I'd luckily be prepared for). On the offhand chance he did say that he liked me back, I wouldn't feel if that was a truly genuine like, but as if the guy felt guilty for someone as strange as me liking him, and would say that just so as to not hurt my feelings. And then the last part is, that if I ever stopped liking the guy, or we got in an argument, I wouldn't be able to brake up with him. I'd feel that to be a bit too mean, and just try to get him to not like me instead... I think I'll just stick to the planned life of being a crazy cat lady.

-Peace

P.S. I need this room.

1 comment:

dive to blue said...

The thing with no emotions is:
it doesn't matter whether or not you can persevere or not. There is no fun, there is no practicality, there is no efficiency. Therefore, there is no need or want to do anything.
Like Battle Royale's Kazuo Kiriyama, to live is simply a choice--not of preference but because simply because a choice CAN be made. Simply, that choice is left up to chance, and is more random than the flip of a coin. In this sense, life is simply another of these choices. To live because we can live.

Reminds of something.
"Miles Edgeworth chooses death."
Heh.